…so i went a bit mental after the Zakaria notes, and wrote this…

I just finished doing the assignment of that  article by Fries Zarkatakita, and I’m shocked out of my senses! I believe I can’t believe what I think I just read! Thank God for this blog and the opportunity I now have to take issue with this issue that the esteemed Mr. Zapata brought up and thrust into my brain. Now let’s get on to the fun part of this homework and rip this upstart immigrant a new one.

First of all, we’re number one. I don’t care where you get your so-called stats from, Mr. Freeze. Ermerica’s the best! How dare you say all of these other countries outrank us in anything! We invented the ranking! They’re all just copying our infinite greatness. So there’s that.

Point number two. However you want to spice it up with “common sense” or “plain talking”, your whole article just reads like left-wing propaganda to me. You’ve been hanging out with Billary too much, my friend. While my brave comrades(no, that word’s commernist)–I mean, good buddies in Congress are putting up roadblocks to every kind of socierlist doctrine that the liberals are trying to shove through, you just seem to be calling it a matter of ideology or something. Well, Mr. Zachary, it’s not ideology. It’s what we believe, and we’ll fight to the death to defend our civil rights! This is the Ermerican Way that our forefathers died for! And there goes point number two.
Thirdly, you didn’t say much about our God-given military. Those soldiers of ours are busy defending the Ermerican Way in every dark corner of the earth. I want you to acknowledge that, sir. No article about Ermerica should ever give our soldiers the brush off. They’re dying and killing in every country in the whole world and spreading Ermerica wherever they go. Whether those countries want them or not, our boys are there. And girls. They let girls in the military now. That’s a whole other issue. You should have mentioned them also, because I just can’t right now.
Point the fourth: I don’t see you offering much in the way of solutions there, Mr. Zapateria. You criticize and criticize, but what would you have us do? We can’t let the liberals just have their way. You really think the founding fathers wouldn’t be rolling in their graves if they just heard the word “Democrat“? They didn’t have that party in the good old founding days, and they wouldn’t have let them in the door if they did have them. It just makes you think of ancient Greek times and perverted old men in towels running around and being all “democratic” with each other. Sheesh! So your liberal agenda really doesn’t make sense in the foundation kind of way. If it’s not in the Constitution, I don’t want any part of it, sir.
The fifth pint–I mean point, is simply this: you sound like you want to just hand the reins over to Mr. Obama. Even though you didn’t literally come out and say anything of the sort, I can read between your lines here. I can read any intention into your little article regardless if you intended it or not. You want to hand over the rein to BroncObama.  And I don’t aim to let any socierlist like that near my horse. “Give Obama the wheel”, you seem to be saying. Well, no thank you. He’d probably run my truck right over my horse. In short, sir, I do not like the cut of his jib. And, no, Mr. Obama may not sail my boat, either. He may have got elected, but that doesn’t make him my president.
Sixthly(sixily?), I’d just like to say Ermerica doesn’t need any foreign ideas to make things better up in here. Those kinds of ideas are fine where they’re at, thank you very much. What’s good for the goose has no relevance to the Ermerican eagle! I mean, you’d think even a foreigner could realize that!
In closing, I would like to kindly thank you for your interest, Mr. Frank Zappa, but we don’t mean to buy any of what you’re selling. Ermerica will be fine. Always have been. Always will. And we’ll get through these dark times the same way we ever have before. Lord Jesus has blessed us with another Bush.

image.w174h200f3Jeb-Bush_20130308062251_320_240

Crisis averted. Ermerica, you’re welcome.

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4 thoughts on “…so i went a bit mental after the Zakaria notes, and wrote this…

  1. Im happy to have read this…I was really confused at first not gonna lie I was like wait this is Dylan?…and then I was like yes this is Dylan.

  2. This was nice not only did you put Zakaria in his place, but you took it to the next level. I have heard some good rants in the past but this one went above and beyond. I noticed how he forgot to mention the fact that this country gives aid to countries all over the world. We are by far the most giving people on the planet. Who does the world turn to time of need? The American people are the first to be called on. I think Zakaria needs to look at the picture of the American people not just a bunch the statistics on some bull shit paper. You are right, he does point out all of our problems but doesn’t give a damn solution for any of them.I you guess that’s what happens when you come from another country and don’t realize what you talking about. One of the 1st things we need to do is stop giving financial aid to all these countries. This money can be better spent at home, fixing our own infrastructure. When it comes to our founding fathers I think they would be sickened by the way the country is being run today. They would embrace the technology, but would still have foresight to know that this country will continue to evolve and that this government must evolve with it instead of slowing the progress down with wasteful spending and unnecessary programs. Zakaria watches too much Fox news, it is nothing but bullshit. As far as Jeb Bush goes, you have got to be kidding me. We don’t need any more retards in the White House. 2 of them was enough.
    Joe

  3. yolo this is willis just composing one of my 200 word comments. i heard a quote the other day that went like this,

    “communists are people who read Marx, and non communist are those that understand Marx.”

    that leads me to the point that i hate communism. how can you live in such a society. You would always be working without incentive and no matter how much you sweated you would never get any more than anyone else. The only people communism benifits are the learders and other rulers who are at the top acting like they are just one of the many. Look at North Korea. If you ask any of their people wheather they are communist or wutever else they will as always say that they are communist. However from an outsiders point of veiw who hasnt been filled with all the propaganda we know that that fat kid whos there leader has the best life in the world.

    Like come on who wouldnt want to be him. Everyone in his country thinks hes a god. He has well over a hundred wives and if his people ever do turn on him which they probably wont he has three billion dollars stashed away in switzerland so he can still live the good life when hes forced to leave.

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