Mein WordPress Kampf, part three: Award Season Never Ends Round Here

hitler swag

So this week we’re going back in time again through the miraculous powers of the TARDIS that is my blog, or my BLARDIS if you will.

The date was November 9, 2013. I’d just posted Nerd Triathlon the Deuce and, as usual, hardly anyone read it. Imagine my surprise to find this comment:

Hi there! I love your blog and I have nominated you for the Liebster Award. Have a look here:

This delightful slice of spam came from a Blogspot post highlighting a corporation in India that sells sarees from Maheshwar. They’re supposed to be the fucking shit in the world of sarees. And queenzdesire12 is a blog selling Indian jewelry.

Well, color me a bit suspicious and extremely confused, but still:


All that really meant was someone was reading my shit. Someone human was spamming me from somewhere on earth. (I think a human finger is required to push that “spam” button.)

I looked up blog awards and found out that, yes, they’re complete bullshit. But it was the accepted next level of interaction on WordPress so I half-heartedly accepted the Liebster and did the obligatory post.

Obviously, my postings were starting to pay off a little. More and more strangers were finding me, and that was fun. I was also reading more blogs and the ones I liked were generally finding me back. It was slow the way I was going about things but steady, and I was gaining a few new followers with every new post.

Then, of course, I was bestowed my next award!

This one was from V of the Verbal Spew Review, a tasty blog that I was already reading. I felt that my blog was finally arriving and that it surely wouldn’t be long before T of V took over the internet completely! Bask in my hubris by clicking this link.

‘Twasn’t long before I got three more awards, albeit from the same person, when This Labyrinth I Roam deluged me a few days later. Most humbly, I waited a couple weeks or so till I posted about my greatness again.

tay- tay and her trophies

The most thrilling thing about the last two was that real, actual people were giving me imaginary awards this time. And it didn’t end there…but I probably won’t post about awards any more. I feel like, eh, I’ve done it. It was fun at the time. But now I’m good. I’m good.

Though the first bestower was undoubtedly spam, it still led me to embark on EveryDamnDayDecember. That first Liebster was the impetus to blog every day, at least for a stretch of time. So, technically, this post should have been part two since it really belongs before my last story about EvDaDaDec. But I’m like the Tarantino of bloggers sometimes. Linear storytelling is for pussies.

grumpy cat 2

I’ll “pussy” you, mother—

Let’s move along.

So I wrote at an earlier time that I would layout my plans for the blog moving forward. The thing is, I meant to keep posting frequently even when December ended. Not every damn day, but three or four damn times a week. And that has not happened.

I intended this year to establish certain days where certain content would go up. Mania Mondays, Fiction Fridays, etc. That has also not happened. Anyway, I’m not sure that’s really for me. I like to keep you bitches on your toes, not knowing what to expect. And I don’t mean bitches in a negative way. In the immortal words of Katt Williams:

katt williams with quote

If I ever get my shit together, you’ll be the first to know. I’m going to try to post twice a week and then take it from there. More fiction is what I would like to post the most, but those posts get the least views of anything. I’d love to do more movie reviews, but I don’t go to the cinema much and timeliness seems to matter in the review world. I mean, does anyone want my opinion on Wolf of Wall Street now? ‘Cos I saw it a couple days ago.



……………It was good.

For the foreseeable future of T of V I’m going to just keep writing what the fuck I want when the fuck I want to and just hope for the best, I guess. I can promise some form of an original post every Friday. More fiction will probably be going up, but that will be in-between Fridays and not replace the Friday post.

I wish I could participate more with all the little stuff other bloggers do, like contests and prompts and the like. It’s not that I disdain those things, it’s just that I’ve had a limited amount of time for personal writing and most of that time has to be allotted to writing what the fuck I want when the fuck I want to. Hopefully, you understand. Plus, I’m still reading posts from February. Like just today I saw something I really wanted to do while reading this morning, and FUCK! This contest was sixty days ago. The world has moved on. At some point, I may have to delete the last couple months and just start fresh. But I hate to miss something!

To sum up, thanks for reading. Thanks for the comments. Thanks for entertaining me with all your own work.

And thanks for the swaggy awards!

cumberbatch with awards

I have awards as well!

Those look more like Lord of the Rings souvenirs than awards. But thanks for the reminder, because maybe it’s time I explained why you keep popping up in my blog. Is it because:

  1. You’re my favorite actor?
  2. We’re both getting famous at roughly the same time? (The last assumes I am getting famous, of course.)
  3. I just love your absurdly fantastic name?
  4. Idris Elba is too damn handsome to be seen here?
idris elba

Just let me quickly dazzle you…and I’m gone.

5. I actually want my top tag to be “Benedict Cumberbatch”?

6. There are no more reasons; I think it must be one of those first five.


Or perhaps I simply identify with the inimitable suaveness of the Cumberbatch. cumberbatch at the oscars


No, that’s probably not it…




11 thoughts on “Mein WordPress Kampf, part three: Award Season Never Ends Round Here

  1. I laughed when this came a bit prematurely…to my inbox…of course (mind outtie gutter). It is just as funny, now.

    Post as often as you like. Quality over quantity and all that sh!t I know nothing about.

    See you next time!

    • Sorry for coming prematurely to your inbox. I’ve since solved that problem. Actually, I was scheduling it and fucking WordPress published it. And it wasn’t finished yet! So you got a sneak peek, huh? I thought I took it down pretty fast, but I saw there was like one view….

      • Yeah, I try to hit the authors that make me laugh, as soon as I see the notification. Your posts always deliver. I saw that you had added content from the preview.

  2. Whenever Benedict Cumberbatch pops up I think of your blog, so nice associated link 😉
    I used to dance in a village hall in Comberbach (pronounced the same way) don’t know why I thought you’d be the slightest interested In that! It popped into my head.

    Did u do anything on your course about creating WordPress websites?

    • Well I just finished a User Experience and a Web Design class. I had meant to post about the UX but it didn’t happen. Actually, I’m considering changing my program to finish my Liberal Arts credits or to get a teaching credential for English. I found writing code for webpages to be a bit tedious so I don’t see myself doing that as a career now. But I could see myself teaching while I continue to write.
      Hey give my regards to Comberbach in Cheshire County between Northwich and Warrington! (yeah I just wiki’d it)…

      • Yeah my Dad did my website but his code comes up when you load it so he’s going to look at setting up a wordpress off the shelf website for speed.
        What age would you teach? I’d go for primary much more respect for the teacher 😉 no back chat!
        I always do a google search eg when I found out there was a place called Charlotte.

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