Wrote Another Song for You….

So sometimes I come up with words of my own to someone else’s song. I’d like to put all the blame on Weird Al Yankovic and Doctor Demento (Google them, kids, if you’re younguns), but I’ve done it since I was two. Anyway, this foolishness is usually just for my own amusement and I don’t inflict these things on others very often. But now I have a blog! (And a weekly post to fill…)

I put up a song a while ago, I’m Not on Facebook. That was based on 10cc’s classic number one hit from 1975 I’m Not in Love. The following is based on a different tune, but from roughly the same era. If you know it, the title probably will give it away. I stay as close to the rhythm and rhyme scheme of the original as I can.

The first person who guesses the song that inspired this nonsense wins ten T of V points! (Which doesn’t mean anything yet, but someday—who knows?)

The Adequate Spider-Man

So the latest installment of Sony’s (not Marvel Studio’s) Spider-Man series has finally hit theaters in the U.S. We got this movie last in the world, because we’re America….fuck yeah!

The Amazing Spider-Man 2 is what they have called it. And does it ever. Or…does it ever?

I mean…does it ever…amaze?

I’d say the verdict is “Enh”.

Sixth Nerd Triathlon: Spidey Senses Tinglin’

So I saw The Amazing Spider-Man 2…

….it was good.

But I’m not posting my review today because I got to thinking I should preface it by revealing my thoughts on Sam Raimi’s Spider-Man trilogy from last decade. (Yeah, it’s been some time!) In other words, the time is ripe for a special running of the Nerd Triathlon: Spider-Man edition!

Thwiipp, motherfuckers!

May Was Going to be Mamazing

So I pondered throughout the weeks of April. What did I ponder? you may well wonder.

I’d been thinking of nothing less than blogging every day for another whole month! Yeah, I noticed a bunch of y’all doing April A to Z or whatever the fuck it was and I thought that was a cool idea, though I haven’t read most of April’s posts yet (I’m still on February’s). But at T of V we’d rather make up our own shit usually, so I figured I’d steal the month of May.

I would have called it MakeMayMamazing and it would have been. Mamazing, that is. The abbreviated form is MMMMay with each May enunciated with a sensual groan. It would have been superbly sexy. Alas, it never stood a chance of actually happening.

Why? No good reason, I just couldn’t muster up the will. For one thing, I’m moving this weekend—all the way to the other side of Vancouver. (Vancouver in the state of Washington that is, otherwise known as North North Portland.) This move will put me closer to my school, freeways and downtown. It’s a good move. But moving’s a bitch. Heavy furniture’s the least of my problems: I’ve got thousands of books, comics, games, DVDS and all kinds of boxed junk to haul. And then, I get to unpack it all again! So I just figured my first week’s daily posts wouldn’t be very good. This is going to be a busy week.

For a second thing…there is no second thing, really.

But I think we’ll do MakeMayMamazing next year, so I’m throwing it out there. Have I copyrighted the term? Just assume I have. Will I try another month of daily blogging this year before EveryDamnDayDecember comes back around? Maybe. Don’t know yet. We’ll always have December at least, that’s a tradition.

No regular Friday post this week, so sorry. Next Friday I’ll probably put up the one about my deep love for the NBA and the playoffs. I am just not in the mood to edit a long post right now. If you’re lucky, I might even mention that racist guy who owns a team you probably had never heard of before.

I didn’t even know L.A. had two basketball teams!

(Full disclosure: I’m a Lakers fan. L.A. is still a Lakers town, goddammit. Even if they look like they’re not going to be in the playoffs again for a generation…)

Hey, Amazing Spider-Man 2 comes out tonight in the U.S.A.! As of this writing, Thursday evening, midnight showings are a few hours away. No, I don’t do midnight shows any more. The buzz is mixed on this one. I’ll be posting my take on the movie as soon as I see it. Hopefully, there won’t be a goddamn massacre, but America…fuck yeah…

Also, if you’d like you could pop over to Tipsy Lit and vote for my story, The Power Trio. The reader poll goes up on Saturday. Just find my link and vote vote vote! I don’t know if you can vote three times but if you can, go for it!

Tipsy Lit is a blogship captained by Ericka Clay, the sexiest half-faced chick on WordPress. I’d love to get some of their readers ‘cos I am also often tipsy, so it seems like a good fit.

Well, there you go. Think of this post as my tribute to my favorite sitcom Seinfeld. If they can do a show about nothing, I can do a blog about nothing.

See y’all later….

Ridley Scott’s Prometheus Gets the Treatment

(So T of V just got hold of the actual original treatment for Ridley Scott’s would-be magnum opus Prometheus. A treatment, in film-making terms, is the written outline of a proposed project that hits upon the highlights of a movie in hopes of getting a studio to pony up the big bucks to produce it. If you saw Prometheus, and were a bit perplexed by it, maybe this behind the scenes look at what they were thinking prior to making it will help you come to some understanding.

But will it answer the biggest question of all: Why would someone allot upwards of $150 million dollars to make this?)

Fifth Nerd Triathlon: Controversy Edition

So its high time for another running of T of V’s Nerd Triathlon. This is an event where I weigh in on a trio of topics of dire consequence to the World Legion of Geeks and Fanatics. Limbered up and ready to go?

This way, Cumberbitches!

A Liberal Doesn’t…

So as most Americans have realized, there is a deep divide between our two major political parties today; deeper, arguably, then it has ever been. Hell, most of the world has noticed that we can’t get along enough to pass the simplest of matters through our congress anymore, much less the important shit. Is this because of a difference in ideals, morals, ethics or any other pretense that both parties like to invoke, I assume sarcastically?

Mein WordPress Kampf, part three: Award Season Never Ends Round Here

So this week we’re going back in time again through the miraculous powers of the TARDIS that is my blog, or my BLARDIS if you will.

Mein WordPress Kampf, part two: Every Damn Day and Afterwards

So where were we?

Sometime last November I noticed that just about every blog I looked at was in the midst of NaNoWriMo, or National Novel Writing Month. The goal of this exercise in sadomasochistic blog-flogging is to write a thousand words of a novel every day while also blogging daily about the experience.

Mein WordPress Kampf

So, prior to last summer, I’d never blogged on the internet before. I knew I wanted a website for my writings, and this train of thought led me to wanting more web savvy in general. Since I was going to teach myself Web Design and Production anyway, I decided to go back to school and work towards a degree in the field.

Summer quarter 2013 came along, and I started at Clark College in Vancouver, WA. I decided to take English 101 during my first quarter to help me get comfortable going back to school. (And it’s required for pretty much every degree.) Yeah, I’ve taken 101 at college before, but so long ago it seems another life.